...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
