I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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