Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
