My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
