We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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