He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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