okay pat passed out under dana's car
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Randomize
