"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Randomize
