Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
