I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Randomize
