don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
