It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
