I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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