You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
