someone get that fucking seahorse.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
is wine microwaveable?
He felt like a one man threesome
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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