Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize