D3 body, D1 cock
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Randomize
