so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
When did angry sex become our thing?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
