I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
