I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
the raccoons are back...
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