i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
