dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize