I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I party with great urgency now.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
