Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
