Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
