I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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