JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she told me i tasted like america
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
