He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
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