i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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