I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
