Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
