Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
