She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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