i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
