I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
