school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Randomize
