What a fucking waste of an outfit
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
