worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
