I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
