i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
