if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
