one two three fourrrrnication!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
