Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Randomize
