Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
All I want is dick and wine.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
