I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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