I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
