dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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