when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
