I showed him my bush... on skype.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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