Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
