thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
